India's Daughters: They Make it Happen

Sometimes you don't need too many of your words. You just need to be an instrument to spread the words of others. No, not just the words, but the works, the really good, noble and inspiring works of others. Today's post is like that. 

Today's post is about India's daughters who make me proud to be one of their sisters. I share about only a few such daughters, but there are countless others. All across the length and breadth of this vast country.

Come, listen to their stories.

Ardhnarishwara, at Airavateswara temple, Darasuram

Photo by Suhas Mehra

Daughter # 1: Neelam, Haryana

Thirty-one-year old Neelam is the sarpanch of Chappar village in Haryana. She ran in the village elections for the post of sarpanch because she wanted to see a positive change in her village. The state of Haryana has been notorious for having a highly skewed sex ratio owing primarily to neglect of girl-child and sex-selective abortion.

Under the leadership of Neelam, this has begun to change. Chappar villagers now distribute sweets and welcome every newborn girl child. She has been encouraging girls to continue their education. More women are now actively participating in the village matters.

Watch a video interview with Neelam to learn more about her work here.

Daugther # 2: Sindhutai Sapkal (Mai), Maharashtra

Sindhutai Sapkal is an Indian social worker known particularly for her work for raising orphan children.

Born in 1948 in a very poor family, she attended school only until 4th grade. As was the custom in those times in her village community, she was married off at the age of 10. Her abusive husband abandoned her when she was 20 years old and pregnant. Her personal struggles became her inspiration for her life-long work which has given her the title of Mai (mother), Mother of Orphans.

As of 2012, Sindhutai Sapkal has nurtured about 1,442 orphaned children. Many of her adopted children are well-educated lawyers and doctors.  Some, including her biological daughter, are running their own independent orphanages. One remarkable fact about Mai's life is that she donated her biological child to a trust running an orphanage in Pune, only to eliminate the feeling of partiality between her daughter and her adopted children.

Mai has been honoured with hundreds of awards. All the award money goes to create and maintain homes for her ever-growing family of sons, daughters and grandchildren.

Read more about Mai's work here.

Daughter # 3: Kudumbashree, Women's self-help group, Kerala

In September 2014, the state of Jammu & Kashmir faced its worst flood in 100 years. The disaster took the lives of more than 200 people, and left thousands of people homeless.

Indians from across the country came forward to extend their support. Food packets, clothes and medicines and other supplies were sent across. But there was one essential woman-specific requirement that was ignored by all – sanitary napkins.

Enter the women of Kerala’s biggest women’s self-help organization, Kudumbashree. In association with Get Closer, a CSR management company, the women manufactured thousands of sanitary napkins in just 2 days, and were able to transport them urgently to their “sisters” in Kashmir.

Read more about this story here.

Daughter # 4 and many more: 

I can't end this post without highlighting once again the stories of five more brave daughters of India. I spoke about them in my recent article in Swarajya.

Theirs are the stories in which we will find lessons for not only finding one's strength to fight back, stand up for one's honour, self-respect and rebuild one's life. Theirs are the stories in which we may also find some powerful lessons for how to fight against social evils such as violence toward women. These are the daughters of India who have shown the path of courage and self-respect to countless other women.

How I wish we will make films after films about their courage, about the way they inspire so many women.

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Such positive stories are all around us. Of women who make it happen.

On the occasion of International Women's Day, I salute these daughters of India. And all those unnamed billions of women all across the length and breadth of India and in the world, who have in their own little or big ways made a difference to the lives of people around them.

...no law can liberate women unless they liberate themselves; likewise, men too, in spite of all their habits of domination, will cease to be slaves only when they have freed themselves from all inner enslavement.  (The Mother)

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Women AND Men: To read this blog's IWD special post from last year, click here

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Linking this with Blog-a-rhythm's IWD Linkup.

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Linking this with ABC Wednesday, H: H is for Happen



#Makeithappen
#Internationalwomensday

Difficult Decisions

A new post in the series - Reminders to self

Photo by Hengki Koentjoro

This morning my husband and I had a long talk with our gardener. About five trees in our garden. We had similar talks before but without much seriousness. Today we had to come to a serious decision. Mindfully, carefully thought out decision.

You see, our garden space is actually quite narrow, and the previous owners of the house had planted several trees while the house was being built. Some of these trees were perhaps not really planted with much careful thought, especially not with a consideration of the fact that trees grow big and bigger. As much as we are grateful for the fact that we have a nice green space in our home which is a great source of joy and beauty, we are also beginning to get concerned about the location of these trees.

They are planted too close to the boundary wall, in fact the trunks of two neem trees are already beginning to cause some cracks in the wall. There is a very tall teak tree with its beautiful trunk, but it has become too big for its place and is really leaning heavily on the boundary wall. There is also one part of a flowering oleander tree which is beginning to look worrisome. And then there is a big palm tree with a heavy root system planted very close to one of outer walls of the house itself.

The solution has to be drastic. Just a few months ago also we had been through a lot of drastic action in the garden (read about that here). And now this.

A part of my heart cries when I think of what will be happening in my little garden in a few days.

But I have already started thinking about what I will be planting in the places left vacant. Of course, no trees that tend to grow big and bigger. Plus I take comfort in the thought that we may still be able to save part of the oleander tree. I also plan to save as much of the wood from the trunks as possible and use the log pieces to make stands for potted plants.

There is however a part of me that can't come to terms with what I am about to witness. It has taken me a long time to be convinced of what must be done. Ever since moving into this house more than three years ago, we knew this time would come sooner or later. And we had been somewhat preparing in advance by carefully doing some planting of smaller trees, vines and bushes which will eventually fill up those corners left behind by the big trees.

But still it hurts.

My thought goes to all the trees that have been removed from the face of the earth because we, the people needed to build roads, buildings, flyovers, bridges, houses etc. My thought goes to all the trees that had to be cut down because we, the people needed nice looking furniture and floors. And paper. And more paper.

My thought goes to all the trees that were cut down simply because we didn't know better.

Am I being hypocritical here? Here I am thinking about all those trees that have been cut down from times immemorial and those that are being cut down as I write this. And yet soon I myself will add a few more to the total count of the 'cut down' trees.

I can persuade myself by words such as -- my situation is different, I have no choice, I can't let these trees cause damage to the house. I can also arrogantly think to myself -- didn't I do my bit for the trees by buying all the refurbished second-hand wooden furniture for my home instead of buying new? Don't I recycle? Don't I do composting? Etc etc....I can do all these things to feel comfortable with my decision. But I should not.

I don't know what I am feeling really. Maybe I don't want to know. Because a part of my heart is still crying. Only one thought comes to mind -- Compassion for our Mother Earth. When will we begin to practice that?

Maybe we can begin to practice by consuming less. Less paper, less plastic, less electricity, less petrol, less water. Less things.

Maybe we can begin to practice by being kind to all things around. By gradually becoming mindful of the material world around us.

Maybe we can begin to practice by creating green spaces, even if they are small balcony gardens. Or indoor gardens with a few potted plants.

Maybe we can begin to practice by planning our little green spaces more thoughtfully, more consciously. So we don't have to make some difficult decisions few years down the road.

Yes, that's the lesson I am learning today. Being more mindful, being more thoughtful, being more considerate. Because true and sincere compassion requires mindfulness, awareness and humility. It requires that we be non-judgmental and non-arrogant.

Not easy things to do. Especially when we are so used to thinking that we know what is best for the world and for everyone else in the world. Especially when we are so used to forgetting that there is a force much higher than our very limited intelligence which is leading the world to a higher harmony, much higher than we can ever conceive or imagine, despite or through all the chaos and destruction and turmoil we see around us.

Indiscriminate compassion is the noblest gift of temperament, not to do even the least hurt to one living thing is the highest of all human virtues; but God practises neither. Is man therefore nobler and better than the All-loving?

To exalt one virtue,—compassion even,—unduly above all others is to cover up with one’s hand the eyes of wisdom. God moves always towards a harmony.

                                                                                               ~ Sri Aurobindo (Aphorisms) 

Do I find comfort in these words? Sure I do. Contemplating on these words today is a compassionate thing to do, for myself.

But in addition to feeling the compassion in these words, I also find them teaching me an important lesson -- that of compassion as a means to a greater harmony. Compassion as a means to becoming mindful -- of my choices, my actions, my thoughts, my awareness. This is the lesson I hope to keep in my heart.

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To read previous post in the series, Reminders to self, click here.
To read more posts in the series, click here.

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This is my contribution to the unique global movement called 1000 Voices for Compassion.  Today,  the 20th February 2015, over 1000 bloggers worldwide are publishing posts about compassion. It is an effort to spread goodness and compassion in a world torn by strife and violence.

Linking this with #1000Speak, #1000 voices for compassion  #HinduEnvironmentWeek

Filmy Musings: Amar Prem (Immortal Love)

A new post in the series - "All Music is Only the Sound of His Laughter"

"तुम्हारा नाम पुष्पा  है? मीरा होना चाहिए था"
(Your name is Pushpa? It should have been Meera.)

Remember this line from the classic Hindi movie Amar Prem? In a way, this one simple line from one scene of the film captured much of the essence of the film, by reminding the audience of the purity of Meera's love, love that is selfless and simply exists for the sake of loving and becoming one with the beloved.

The 1972 film directed by Shakti Samanta spoke of an immortal love, of a love beyond the conventions and rules of society, of a love that is not meant to be imprisoned by the hypocrisy of the so-called moralists and guardians of social order. It spoke of a love that doesn't need to shout from the rooftops to be accepted but is quietly convinced of its truth and therefore its purity.

The forms of the love portrayed in this film are several -- between a man and a woman who are not related to each other in any socially accepted way, between a mother and a child who is not really her child, between a father and a son who is not really his son, between a child and a mother who is not really his mother, between a sister and a brother who is not really her brother. Basically, it is love that brings these strangers together and ties them in bonds that are stronger than any blood tie or any other socially accepted relation. The love portrayed through these different characters in this film is pure, soft and selfless, and expressive of deep caring and self-giving.

Sure there are some sequences and characters in the film that remind the audience that such love is rare and that majority of minds are imprisoned in the narrow and conventional views of what is socially acceptable and what is not. The plot however gradually moves in such a way that the hearts that are relatively more open to the deeper truth of things begin to see what love really is and should be, and find a way to accept love as simply love beyond any definition of society and society-approved morality.

The best part is that the film doesn't do any of this in any preachy, lecturing sort of way. It does this through a simple story told simply but beautifully.

With its soft and feel-good acting, a gently paced and unpretentious narration, beautiful music, heart-touching poetry and tender writing this film will always remain one of the all-time favourites of mine.

Image: The Kiss, Artist: Freydoon Rassouli

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To see previous post in the series, click here.
To see all posts in the series, click here.

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Linking this with ABC Wednesday, L: L is for Love

The Stuff of Our Lives

A new post in the series - Reminders to self

Photo by Josh Adamski

How temporarily relevant every material thing is...temporarily useful, temporarily pleasant, and temporarily meaningful...and yet at the moment something in us feels that if only we can possess that particular object, this one thing we could be so happy, so content. 

And ultimately at some point in time, that definitive moment comes when all our possessions, all the objects, all the stuff we so meticulously collected over our lives stays here in this physical realm, as our last journey out of this realm commences. What happens to all that stuff – the stuff of our temporary lives? Do we ever wonder about this all the while we are busy collecting, possessing, accumulating? Do we ever imagine, even for a split second, how will our loved ones handle all that stuff we so carefully kept in our closets, cupboards, and drawers?

Perhaps the real focus of our lives should be on accumulating the stuff of the hearts. The love, care, sweetness, tenderness, faith, trust, generosity and compassion we invest in our relationships and bonds with all who enter our lives are what keeps us intimately connected with them even after we move to those other realms beyond this earth. That will be our true inheritance to our loved ones, our true legacy, our true connection with those we leave behind. That will truly be the Stuff of Our Lives...Lives Here and Beyond. 

Previous posts in this series:

Light an Incense      God is At Home....

From Darkness to Light

A new post in the series - Satyam Shivam Sundaram

A series featuring inspiring words from various sources, words that speak of  timeless truths, words that remind me of the deeper and hidden truth behind surface events and phenomena, words that shine light when all seems dark, words that are just what I need - 

for this moment and for all times to come.

Light at Vardharaja Perumal Temple, Kanchipuram

Photo by Suhas Mehra

Read and contemplated upon a beautiful aphorism from Sri Aurobindo yesterday. 

This is my prayer and invocation for this special day of Diwali.

May this Festival of Lights bestow upon the humanity a vision to see a bit more deeply, a bit more highly, a bit more widely. 

"When I look back on my past life, I see that if I had not

failed and suffered, I would have lost my life’s supreme

blessings; yet at the time of the suffering and failure,

I was vexed with the sense of calamity. Because we

cannot see anything but the one fact under our noses,

therefore we indulge in all these snifflings and clamours.

Be silent, ye foolish hearts! Slay the ego, learn to see and

feel vastly and universally."

~ Sri Aurobindo, Thoughts and Aphorisms

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Previous posts in this series:

Do Not Imitate        Beauty, Not a Stone on the Beach      So, What are You Working on?     

Inner Truth of a Flower         On Sensitivity and Appreciation of Beauty   

"No Construction Without Destruction"

Those Quiet Memories

A new post in the series - "All Music is Only the Sound of His Laughter"

Painting by Bindu Popli

A quiet, lazy summer afternoon.

A mother and a daughter sitting side by side on comfortable chairs. Sitting quietly. The daughter is idly browsing through some files on her cell phone, looking for nothing in particular. The mother is meditating with her eyes closed. Or at least trying to meditate. A nice, warm feeling prevails in the room. No sounds, except the slight hiss of the airconditioner, mixed with their quiet breathing.

Out of the blue, the mother opens her eyes and asks the daughter what she was doing. Nothing, she says, and stops fidgeting with her phone. Turns toward her mother, wating for her to speak.

"Do you have any old bhajans on your phone?"

"I don't think so, but let me check. I may have a couple. Do you want to hear some bhajans?"

"No, not really. I just asked because your sister has a lot of bhajans on her phone. The other day, when she visited she played some for me."

"Well, I only keep a few old songs on my phone...here, I found this old song, I think you may like it. Do you want to hear it?"

"Ok, play it."

Voice of Manna Dey, who died yesterday, 24 Oct 2013, Music by Salil Choudhary

As the song plays, they both listen quietly. The song ends. The daughter plays it again. A few tears begin to swell up in corners of their eyes. The song ends. They sit quietly. Just with each other. Just by each other's side. Nobody says anything. Only the silence speaks. Speaks of a quiet love, a quiet longing, maybe a quiet fear of what is to come.

They both know the inevitable can happen any day. The daughter may never have such an afternoon again with her mother. The deadly disease could strike its final blow any day. The memory will always remain with her, of that quiet afternoon, those few minutes spent in her mother's drawing room...listening to the lines...

maa.n kaa dil ban ke kabhii siine se lag jaataa hai tuu 
aur kabhii nanhii.n sii beTii ban ke yaad aataa hai tuu
jitnaa yaad aataa hai mujhko utnaa taDpaataa hai tuu
tujh pe dil qurbaan 

Sometimes you cling to my chest as my mother’s heart,
and sometimes I remember you as my little daughter.
The more I remember you, the more you torment me.
I shall sacrifice my heart for you. 

Motherland. Land of her mother. Her mother's home. Her motherland. What will it be like to visit that home when she is gone? Does a mother's home, a mother's land remain so when the mother is gone?

The daughter may never know the reason why she chose that particular song to share with her mother that afternoon. May be she will.

Click here for the previous post in this series.

Imagine a Society Like This...

On the Occasion of Indian Independence Day....

For the Freedom that is Yet to be Won....

Imagine a Future Society...

Where the fulfilment an individual is seeking is “not the utmost development of his egoistic intellect, vital force, physical well-being and the utmost satisfaction of his mental, emotional, physical cravings, but the flowering of the divine in him to its utmost capacity of wisdom, power, love and universality and through this flowering his utmost realisation of all the possible beauty and delight of existence.”

Where the individual grasps the truth that “he is not only himself, but is in solidarity with all of his kind... That which we are has expressed itself through the individual, but also through the universality, and though each has to fulfil itself in its own way, neither can succeed independently of the other.” (Sri Aurobindo, The Human Cycle, pp. 46-47).

Where a substantial mass of individuals have experienced the inner evolution of consciousness and are leading their lives in accordance with an inner law of the spirit.

Where an individual’s law of the spirit leading him or her in a unique direction specifically suited for the individual’s progress is not in conflict with the life-direction of other individuals on their unique journeys of seeking for true subjectivism. Free-progress of the individual and infinite variation among the individual paths of progress captures the group consciousness as the underlying deepest truth of human experience.

Where individuals realize the inherent ideal purpose of their works. Writers’ hearts open wide to receive experiences and realizations that are translated into words and woven in beautiful prose and poetry that avoid unnecessary sensationalism and convey the deepest truths and ideals of human experience. Artists and sculptors create forms that carry them and their patrons into the realms and imaginations of formless. Musicians and singers in their music bring forth the stirrings of the depths of their souls and create a bridge between the form and formless for the listeners. Dancers bring into being deep, wide formless truths through their graceful forms and movements in front of which all purified human hearts would involuntarily bow in utmost humility.

Source

Where children grow with self-discipline that comes from deeper freedom, not with mindless confusion and mind-numbing authority. Parents discover the true spirit behind the words – “child is the father of man.” Teachers and students are co-learners in their journeys to discover and uncover the truths of the world; they collaborate in a mutually respectful manner and deeply appreciate and grow from their differences. Education is not a business, and businesses are managed through human-centered and consciousness-based approaches. Business leaders worry less about the balance in their bank accounts but more about the balance in their junior-most employee’s retirement accounts. 

Wealth-generation as an important social activity has regained its heart and realizes its purpose in creating a warm luxurious reign of beauty, harmony, comfort and contentment for all. The weakest and poorest sections of the society are looked after by an enlightened socialistic economic setup where individual freedom and enterprise is just as valued and encouraged as state-run programs and enterprises. A spiritualized ethic of compassion and caring for all creation guides social action.  

        

Where small, sufficiently self-reliant economic and social aggregates are freely formed by individuals who have come together because of common interests, backgrounds, and affiliation. These aggregates encourage people to practice the kind of work that is deeply meaningful and fulfilling, but in the name of self-reliance and self-sufficiency there is no pressure to cover all needed areas of economic activity. The sphere of economic activity is determined by the creative potential of the people in a community, and the availability of natural and other resources in their geographical area. Reasonably regulated exchange of goods and services among the aggregates is preferred without encouraging mass and unlimited production of goods and services that could lead to unbridled commercialism, industrialism, and rule of the market. 

A small group of elected officials use a consensus-based decision making process to manage the necessary administrative functioning of the aggregate. Politics, law-enforcement, and other necessary administrative and governmental activities are chosen as life’s work by those individuals who see these fields of action as instruments with a deeper purpose to bring forth the ideal of Divine Life on earth. These individuals work toward increasing transparency in legislative, executive and judicial branches of the government.

Where such smaller aggregates are loosely and freely held together by a common spirit that ties them to larger aggregates. People are relatively free to move from one social aggregate to another, are able to make decent living in new places. This type of migration and assimilation is somehow smoother because of the already-loosening hold of one’s social and cultural egos that could prevent one from connecting to somewhat unfamiliar cultural and social norms. 

The tendency of political, social and cultural aggregates is not to dominate or devour the ones that are relatively weaker and poorer, but to aid them to grow and develop with their unique identities and traditions intact and blossoming. Cultural traditions, practices and values are not marketable items, but there is a free-flowing exchange of ideas and thoughts leading to new forms of synthesis of a variety of traditions and practices. 

The larger aggregate is secure in the unity of its spirit and in the diversity of its forms. With full confidence in such deep and inner security these aggregates interact with other large and small aggregates and collectivities in the spirit of mutual respect and peaceful co-existence. Compassionate progressivism, free-spirited interdependence, shared prosperity and a free unity of nations guide international diplomacy.  

Illustration by Willy Pogany

Where there is a wider human tendency to live through and with pain, death and loss as the needed grist for the mill so that individual soul may progress and grow through such experiences. Humanity recognizes that the misery and violence resulting from exaggerated mental, vital and physical ego are crude but necessary steps to a golden future that is evolving through these stumbling efforts.

There is a kinder and more compassionate understanding and acceptance of those dark moments and life-phases that are part of overall human experience, and these are seen as opportunities for deepening one’s transformation. Peace comes from the realization that it is an endless journey to perfection that we are on. Tranquility comes from the knowledge that every little victory along the way is a marker to the countless victories that await us, and every little failure along the way is a sure sign of even more countless victories that await us. Calm courage of the spirit is the inner guide as individuals move through various stages and phases of life.

Imagine. We must. 

Create. Can we? 

Begin. How? 

Seek. We must.